Kembali Menulis

Assalamualaikum dan hai semua..

Sekian lama tidak menulis, dan sekali lagi rasa terpanggil untuk memperbaiki azam dan mengemaskini blog..Ya Allah, lihatlah betapa manusia suka berazam dan betapa sukar untuk memenuhinya..apapun, saya percaya, jangan pernah berhenti berazam dan berharap, kerana hidup ini adalah didasarkan pada harapan...When there's hope, there's life!

wah, oleh yang demikian saya harap saya dapat mengekalkan mod menulis sebegini..but being too serious just doesnt sound me...hik3..I somehow prefer to sound more relax and jovial..well, whatever it is, I'm just being me;)

Oleh kerana ini adalah update setelah sekian lama tidak menulis, maka saya harus buat satu ringkasan tentang perjalanan hidup saya yang memerlukan sedikit pengkisahan, mungkin? supaya mudah utk difahami dan dibuat gambaran umum terhadap keadaan seorang 'Seri' yang masih 'pinkaholic' itu..

Pengkisahan 1 : NO LONGER A TEACHER
Saya meletakkan jawatan sebagai guru atau nama glamournya "Pegawai Perkhidmatan Pendidikan Siswazah' bermula 5 Ogos 2011 atas sebab-sebab yang telah saya pertimbangkan sedalam-dalamnya.Walaubagaimanapun, saya amat menghargai dan sentiasa merindui pengalaman hampir 10 tahun mengajar dan saya yakin itulah yang telah sebati dalam hidup saya. Walaupun saya tidak lagi bergelar guru, namun saya tetap dan akan terus berbangga dipanggil 'Cikgu Seri', 'Teacher Seri','Madam Seri' dan masih ada jua yang kekal memanggil saya 'Cik Seri'.Saya percaya, once a teacher, forever a teacher. Aspirasi guru itu tetap mekar dan segar dalam jiwa saya, dan saya percaya sentiasa ada ruang untuk berbakti, ia boleh dilakukan dalam pelbagai cara.

Pengkisahan 2 : I'M A MOM NOW
Alhamdulillah, I'm blessed with the presence of Nufael Akeef..he's now 5 mths..(and a reason why I stop blogging)*cehh....suka letakkan pelbagai alasan kan??heeee~
Kehadiran Akeef amat-amat merobah kehidupan ini..perasaan bergelar ibu amat sukar saya gambarkan dan luahkan..apapun, tanggungjawab yang datang bersamanya itu lebih membimbangkan, mampukah diri ini menunaikan hak-hak Akeef sebagai seorang anak..semoga saya diberi kekuatan dan sayab percaya kehadiran Akeef banyak mengajar saya erti tanngungjawab dan amanah.Mommy loves u Akeef!!

Pengkisahan 3 : I'M A BETTER SPA OWNER
Alhamdulillah, saya kini berpeluang mengurus spa dengan lebih baik apabila sudah tidak terikat lagi dengan tugas-tugas hakiki seorang guru. Di spa saya juga mampu menjadi guru,memberi panduan pada pelanggan-pelanggan di spa saya, membina ukhuwwah dan jaringan yang meluas, memberi ruang pekerjaan dan pendedahan pada remaja2 perempuan yg berminat dalam bidang kecantikan dan keusahawanan, dan saya harus katakan di sini tugas mengemudi sebuah perniagaan adalah cabaran hebat untuk saya galas, insya Allah saya mengahrapkan Seri's Spa akan terus berkembang dan bersaing hebat dalam industri kecantikan.

Pengkisahan 4 : IT'S GET BACK TO CAMPUS TIME!
Alhamdulillah, dengan kesempatan dan keizinan yang dipinjamkan olehNya, saya kini bergelar pelajar kembali di universiti kecintaan saya, Gedung Ilmu yang saya rindui..Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia, yang Mengilhamkan Harapan dan Membina Masa Depan..bergelar pelajar sarjana dalam pengkhususan Sosiologi Pendidikan. Saya mengambil peluang ini untuk menerokai perjalanan baru yang saya pasti dipenuhi 1001 pengalaman. Apapun, inilah ruang untuk saya terus mencintai dan menimba ilmu..Ilmu yang bermanfaat dan berharga untuk kita praktikkan serta sebarluaskan selepas ini. Siapa tahu, saya mungkin mampu menjadi motivator suatu masa nanti..jika tidak utk kelompok besar, sekurang2nya untuk Akeef, rakan2nya dan mereka yg berada di sekeliling saya. Saya amat teruja kembali bergelar pelajar:)

Sekian saja coretan kali ini, saya akan terus mewarnai blog ini dgn cerita2...*harapan lagi*

Again, when there's hope, there's LIFE!

Biarku Menjadi Lilin

Salam

I was first introduced to this song when I was teaching in Limbang, Sarawak.
It was such an unofficial theme song for Teacher's Day celebration..This morning, one of my beloved students shared his problem, he sounded so disappointed unlike the way he always before..well, everybody has their ups n downs in life. I tried to give him some advices, hrmm..that's what teachers are for..to help, to guide n to give some words of wisdom~hehe (mcm la terer sgt)

and suddenly those lyrics pop out in my head 'aku takkan bertanya apekah nanti balasannya"..then I pun terus carik lagu dlm youtube and yeah, it really rejuvenated my feelings~ I always have this thought in my mind :

A GOOD TEACHER TELLS
A MEDIOCRE TEACHER EXPLAINS
A GREAT TEACHER INSPIRES..

I wanna be a great teacher:)



So readers, here's the lyrics of Biarku Menjadi Lilin by Pelangi

Biarku menjadi lilin
memberikan cahaya
terangi sekeliling dengan diri terbakar
tak siapa yang sedar
Di saat kegelapan rela aku berkorban
demi satu harapan

Biar masa berlari
dan kau terus mendaki
aku tenang di sini
dengan sabar menanti
tanpa dendam dan benci

Andainya kau terjatuh, terluka dan tersungkur
ku rawat biar sembuh

Aku takkan bertanya
apakah nanti balasannya
setiap pengorbanan setiap pemberian
demi satu ikatan

Keikhlasan di hati
walaupun sering kau ragui
pada suatu masa dan suatu ketika
akan ketara jua

Biarku menjadi lilin
Memberikan cahaya
saat kau kesepian
saat kau kegelapan
ku rela menerangkan

Aku senang begini dapat terus berbakti
dengan cara sendiri


"some of the gifts I received on 2010 Teacher's Day, well...akau takkan bertanya, apakah nanti balasannya"

P/s : Saya tenang dan gembira berbakti dengan cara begini~

It's New Year, 2011

Salam...

Remember I wrote about my sleepless nite before going to Phuket??pheww..and might it be the reason for my WORST ever plane trip??haish...I vomitted for 5 times, n it brought me to think bukan2 like "am I pregnant???" although it was clearly NOT since I was having my menses that day, (it lead me to take the never-taken-before pain killer)..and I bet that was the REASON for me having this so sengsara travelling experience=(

Pics later yeah..

Well, today is the first schooling day for the year 2011!!
When I was on my way to school, I listened to Riuh Pagi Era, no more "Can I help u??" segment..Pak Nil was announcing a new segment that is 'Caaayaang Dia!!", they were aired from SK Desa Pandan..he interviewed few students, parents and also the headmistress of the school.
When I was approaching Persiaran Fauna 2, (where my school is situated at)I saw a no ordinary long queue of cars, (yeah, I expected that..first day of school, Year One and Form One..most parents on leave and took the chance to accompany their beloved ones to school.
Assembly went fine and the 1st day was so fine..yeah, my 1st day of 10th year teaching..what do u expect??
In the evening, I checked my fb, (yeah, kinda addicted to it) and saw my buddy's daughter,Kasih in her photos, she was also on her first day to Smart Reader!!How time flies....Kasih is now 5!!Another two years to register to Year 1..

AND THAT BRINGS ME HERE...

I wANT TO SHOUT to the world..."I WANNA BE A MAMA, SO FREAKING BAD!!!!!"

So long..

Salam

I told myself, u must update this blog before the year ends..haha..n one of my students said, "apsal teacher tak habis2 baling tepung?"..hoho, it reminded me of my (again) abandoned blog...haish, I shudnt have started one;)

For the past few months, my hubby n I were in "HURU HARA PERIOUD"..he was SOOOO occupied with his conversion classes, line training and check..(well, I dont really know the exact terms used for those pilots training)..alhamdulillah he managed to finish all and I'm now waiting for him to be officially called "captain"..whatever it is, we always have this thought "What is there with titles??" erm..

So, the day he finished his HURU HARA perioud, I said.."Well, it's time for a vacation!!Phuket may be"..harhar..just a small try, naughty me=)
He ran up the stairs, n I bet he watched tv or playing games, while I would spend hours in facebook n my fashion magazines,harharhar..then, he asked.."so u feel like going??"..n me gave all my reasons and causes..he finally said "alrite, let's do the booking.."Yeay!!I was so happy, people say NO HARM TRYING!Gagagagaga=)

Oh dear,I'll be going to Phuket in few hours time n I havent packed any single stuff yet!!I was not really sure if this is a penyakit or what..but, I'll face the same problem everytime I'm leaving for somewhere..no matter it's a vacation, a course, a competition, going back to kampung. going back to hostel or college (back to d old days)..I just couldnt pack my stuffs early..I won't be sleeping and will be delaying my packing,grrr...wonder, but that is what gonna happen every time=(

Well. I hope I'l manage to pack nice clothes n scarves to wear!Yeah, I'll be in Phuket in few hours=)

Kecelaruan Minda

Salam

Sy sebenarnya nak upload entri "Kenapa saya tak mau berhenti mengajar"..tapi hari ni saya nak tulis pasal lain pula..

Saya adakalanya terfikir apa perasaannya bila ada anak?mesti best..erk, sebab sy belum ada anak..
tapi hari ni sy terfikir, "Sanggupkah?Mampukah?"
kerana melihatkan apa2 yang terhidang di media, di persekitaran mereka,especially melihat gambar2 dan aktiviti remaja sekarang, erk..saya sangat takut.Saya terfikir, mampukah saya mengawal anak2 saya nanti? Bagaimana nak tangani gejala sosial yg tak tunggu remaja je, kanak2 pun dah amat mudah "polluted"..erk, mmg sy faham mungkin anda akan kata."Kita harus bekalkan bekalan ilmu agama"..dan ayat2 klise yg lain..benar..benar..tapi melihatkan penguasaan benda yang menjadi "normalisasi", erm..saya amatt takut!!
Sebab tu sy pernah tulis kat FB sy, "Lebih baik tak tahu daripada tahu, lebih baik tak dapat daripada dapat"..sangat luas maksud ayat sy tulis itu..

Ya Allah..semoga kita semua diberi kekuatan. Dan yang paling penting kita ahrus bersyukur, apa sahaja..kita asyik mensyukuri nikmat, tapi kita jarangkali mensyukuri musibah..segalanya milik Allah..Moga saya terus diberi kekuatan untuk meneruskan segala usaha, baik dari segi mendidik generasi, mendidik diri..ye, koreksi diri, itu yang terbaik!

Baling Tepung

Salam

I was teaching Science in 4 Kemanusiaan 1 (4K1), suddenly Ina (kerani) came n said, "Maaf ye Cikgu Seri, Pengetua panggil si polan dan si polan"

it wasnt surprising me at all, these two boyz are naughty..but I'm ok with it=) biasa la budak2 nakal yg baru semalam tido atas lantai kat makmal, bila buat eksperimen pandai pulak jaga..hehe..

I continued my teaching, erm..electrolysis, anode, cathode, anion, cation blablabla..once they came back from Pengetua's room, I pun berkata..

"duk elok2, ape2 yg tak baik, tinggal kat luar dulu, fokus kat ape yg sy ajar nie"

tibalah masa utk membuat latihan, maka saya pun berhenti mengajar dan bertanya..

'Apsal ek awak kena panggil?'..hehe, memang I minah k-pochi

Polan pun bercerita blablabla..
'Pengetua tanya kalau2 sy ada baling tepung kat kelas 5 Akaun ptg smlm'

Nape lak nak baling tepung?

Sebab kelas tu kan menang kelas tercantik 5 bulan berturut2..

Oh ye, so awak ke yg baling?

sy x ngaku Teacher, maksudnya sy tak buat la..

erm, ok..fullstop (I suka pd pendekatan "innocent until proven guilty")

dlm hati sy tergelak2, lama tak dengar pkataan baling tepung, biasa kita buat masa kat skolah sbb nak celebrate b'day ke habis blaja ke..nie kes diorg dengki kelas tu dpt RM300 sbb dpt menang 5 bulan berturut2.

Persoalan: perasaan dengki sbb kelas tu lebih baik, ada positifnya, dan sy la guru yg in charge ptandingan kebersihan tu pd tahun ni..tp kalau sampai nak serak2kan tepung kat kelas tu, mcm amat tak patut (negatif sekali). Pastu,diriku berfikir kalau ape2 yg sy buat mesti kecoh, seperti ptdgn kebersihan kelas ni, ptdgn nyanyian sempena Hari Koperasi, psembahan tarian, dikir barat Hari Guru etc..boleh tak I nak fikir positif n sedikit perasan hari ni, "sebab ape2 yg I buat memberi impak maksima, hehe.."

p/s: Jangan marah ye, kita kan kena yakin pada diri=p

CupCakes Fever

Salam

Am waiting for my cupcakes to be ready!!
(hubby left the house n I was so bored got no one to talk to, n decided to bake)

I wonder how..I wonder why..but I was suddenly caught by the "cupcakes baking n decorating fever"..erm, is it related with the just ended World Cup fever??hehe..whatever it is, I'm happy doing it n I found it's such a wonderful things to do, especially when u r doing it with ur beloved ones..as a matter of fact, my husband is far away better than me(in this particular field only, or a lot of other field as well,heheh)believe it?See the pics as published in my facebook account previous week..

Mr Pilot n his soft skill


And..tadaa...

the awesome outcomes!!

Owh, lemme tell u what makes me write tonite?while inserting the tray into the oven, I suddenly felt so sad, I miss my mom..erm, of course I did not have a Siemen oven back in my childhood, we only have a typical black oven (I bet u know which one I meant, pakai api ye, bukan pakai elektrik)..but I still remember those time when my mom told me..

'dulu2 masa korang kecik mak buat la kek, pakai periuk kukus, ala..nak buat birthday..tp skarang bolehla beli kek..dulu2 org tak byk duit, semua nak jimat'

so, everytime I make cupcakes I will definitely think of my mom..well, though she's not good in baking, most probably bcos she doesnt have the chance to do so..but deep inside I wanna tell her, "Mak, I now can bake a cake in a better oven"..erm, mak selalu pesan.."kita mesti ada penambahbaikan dlm keluarga"..ye mak, saya telah, akan dan sentiasa melakukannya..Miss u Mak!!

Abandoned..

Salam

Lamanya tak menulis, byk sebab:

=fokus pd treatment IVF
=berjaya mengandung, tp kekecewaan dgn keguguran kali ke-2
=mengambil masa bersendirian utk pulih kembali semangat
=bz ngan spa yg sgt perlu perhatian
=terlampau byk nak luahkan sampai tak terluah..

Jadi, hari ni sementara tunggu kek coklat siap, gagahkan diri utk kembali menceriakan blog sebelum ia bersawang=)

Baru dengar result Mentor..si Mohd iaitu mentor Ziana Zain yg menang w'pun secara peribadi sy rasa dia taklah sebagus mana..oleh itu,sy fikir apa yg selalu sy katakan adalah benar.."POPULAR TAK SEMESTINYA TERBAIK"

Satu Untuk Semua

Salam

I supposed to have "Exhausted Part 2", but I failed to write..heheh..morale of the story, never have any intention to put serial entries..hehe..friendly reminder for myself=)

yeah, about the Exhausted Series..it was all about my around the clock extremely packed schedule that made me turned cuckoo!!heheh..I did not even have the chance to complete my facial routine..I mean the DIY facial, not to tell about my nail..nak potong pun tak sempat!Ishishish...Everyday is about work n work (kerja wajib=cikgu, kerja sampingan=spa, kerja hobi=show/tarian, kerja mengarut=melepak)..I had once yelled in my facebook status, I need a vacation!!Definitely, I need one!...hubby kept on saying to go to London by end of this year..erm, but I don't think he meant it...haha

So, after quite sometimes since my last entri..today I would like to share about my Gumilang Sari attempt in School Got Talent-Online Competition..I was given this task by my Pengetua. She said, 'let's give it a try..manalah tau menang RM10K!!' hehe..competition was sponsored by TM and SKMM. Gumilang Sari had their practices for about two weeks though we have problems to get permanent members..u knoe its kinda hard to get boys to join u in dancing club (I mean traditional dance) since they are all prefer to learn on how to shuffle!At the end of the day, I decided to have 7 girlz n only 3 boyz in the team..actually I planned to have equal no.

Video Shooting by SKMM personnel (but the fasilitator mentioned SND, what ever) was held on April 1st. Thanx a lot to Cikgu Sarimah n Cikgu Zarina who had helped me a lot with this..well, I wasnt in a good condition starting March 29..so these two teachers had played their important roles to make this happen. So readers, u may register urself in http://www.bluehyppo.com/ and vote for my team, SMK Cyberjaya-Satu Utk Semua starting May 1st. May be ur vote can help our team to be qualified to the semi final..well, zaman dah berubah. Schools competition format also changed..n I keep on reminding myself, dunia sekarang dunia IT, siapa menguasai IT, maka dia menjadi paling berkuasa..I teringat the last PRU, Pakatan Rakyat menang sbb mereka lebih celik IT dan bijak memanipulasikan kuasa IT, berbanding BN yang pada ketika itu lebih selesa dgn media tradisional.I learnt a lot from there..n it somehow urged me to have this blog. N when Pengetua gave me the task, I terus teringat senario PRU itu.

Now, lets enjoy the pics..captured by Miya, a Gumilang Sari member who wants to leave the group to give 100% focus on PMR..All the best Miya!

Fatin Hasya waited to put on her fake eyelashes, she seems a bit uncomfortable with her costume, poor her..


Rem in lengha, Indian traditional costume n Miya with her big green in samfu..so cute!

Adhani wud always look stunning in kebaya..yeah, exotic Malay maiden look


Me:cuba ko tarik nafas ko tu Ad, tak larat teacher nak temukan pending nie ha..

Ops..kan dah nampak 'muka payah' Cikgu Seri

Meenal, my 1 KRK student, an athlete who can dance..she is the school olahragawati with 4 golds!

the stage, done by Cikgu Sarimah, a UiTM fashion design graduate who had working experience with tv3, lucky SMKCyberjaya to have those talented teachers in school=)

But now I'm in a total rest phase!hehe..will update u soon=)

exhausted..Part 1

Salam..

I had just arrived home and now savouring my super late lunch cum dinner..alone, yeah...all alone..again and again..(I'm fine with it)

Mm, let me tell u my super duper hectic days..I had one week holidays and spent the time at home and school (particularly for tarian training, sbb keje lain x buat pun...hehe)So it was all about the same from Monday (15th) to Friday(19th). Friday night,approximately 10.30pm hubby arrived from Rome?Paris?ntah..I cudnt recall..(sign of aging??)and me forced him to accompany me to get the tarian costumes for Gumilang Sari show from Syahnawi Creation@Serdang.We then tidoq tak ingat dunia!!

Saturday morning: 9.00 am Gumilang Sari training..by 1pm,done and I rushed to Gha's studio (my aerobic n pilates instructor) at Kota Warisan to get songkok Melaka??eh??ke ape pun nama dia la..the minangkabau headgear..On my back home, hubby texted me telling that mom n dad n Nazirah (my chatterbox niece)are coming to my house, their car was somehow giving a freaking sound and they chosed to check at any workshop available in Bandar Seri Putra..They were on their way to Tiara Beach Resort,Port Dickson. N I'm supposed to join them later.

So, when they arrived, mom said.."boleh pegi skarang??" means.."mak, ayah n Nazirah naik kete ko la sbb mak takut la nak bawa keta tu gi PD, kang ape lagi lah bunyi dia buat.." N hubby n I was like lipas kudung kemas barang, alah nothing to bawa pun..one nite vacation jer..So, here are the pics at Port Dickson.

Spent a nite there and the following day we were rushing home because I need to be at school before 1pm for two reasons:
#1 to check on Kelab Kebudayaan Trip to MATIC for Teater Gamat, 40 students are going and Cikgu Zarina n Nada will be the chaperones.
#2 to fetch all those Gumilang Sari dancer to Dewan Perdana Felda for a wedding show.

by 2.00pm : We left school heading to Dewan Perdana Felda..and the havoc are as seen in following pictures..

Show finished about 10pm and I only managed to reach home by 1.45am after sending all those dancers home at Bandar Bukit Puchong 2, Pulau Meranti, Kuarters Bomba Cyberjaya, Dengkil, and Kota Warisan..ITULAH KEISTIMEWAAN SMK CYBERJAYA-students datang dari segala ceruk yang jauh-jauh antara satu sama lain..(hantar depan pintu, anak2 orang nie..)Special thanx to Mr Hubby for ur kindness helping me with those kids.Thanx again hubby, I owe you 1,2,3,4=p

Congested??

Salam..

I just came back from my spa..yeah, check out from skul by 4.20pm, then makan2 sesion at Restoran Mak Teh Cyberjaya together with Maz(of coz), Nada, Hasma n Kak Isma..all are singles but me..hehe..normal scenario, when hubby not around, I'l be 'single' la..hehe..

After had a super LATE lunch (wajar ke dipanggil lunch?), we then made our own way back home..Maz, Hasma n K.Isma to Putrajaya, Nada to Nilai n me to my 'SENJA PERMAI'..Bandar Seri Putra..shoot straight to spa to get any updates n questionnaires posted by my super duper SMAPK senior A.K.A my facebook friend, Kak Aya..I left spa by 7pm, had some discussion with my staf's parent, n then planned to go to stationary shop.Jangan marah..I amat suka beli stationery, walaupun tak pakai...hoho...SGT BUDAK SEKOLAH=)

But, I called it off then..REASON??I didnt get a parking!!haha...what a lame excuse, but that's the truth!!terus nak keluar junction dan TERHEGEH-HEGEH menunggu turn nak kuau!!PERSOALAN??Bandar Seri Putra dah mula sibuk, mana ceruk lagi aku nak duduk??
(Perhatian: Tahap toleransi kepadatan saya AMAT RENDAH!!)Sy TIDAK SUKA tempat ramai orang sehingga saya digelakkan oleh kawan2 saya membeli barang di South City Plaza yg giler xde org!!tempat2 seperti Mid Valley, KLCC adalah allergic utk saya..begitu juga IKEA dan The Curve,,sy hanya pergi pd hari bekerja..weekend???saya tak kan mampu utk pergi!!Dan saya TIDAK gila shopping!!!saya hanya beli ape yg saya mahu dan kebanyakannya saya beli online, hehe..

Conclusion??WORK HARDER AND SAVE MORE, CAN BUY A NEW HOUSE di tempat yg TAK PADAT!!But where??

Emo??

Missing someone until I cry!!
Hate it!!

I hate it when you are not around and the fact that you didn't call..

BUT MOSTLY, I HATE THE WAY THAT I DON'T HATE YOU..
NOT EVEN CLOSE, NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT, NOT EVEN AT ALL!!!

A shoulder to cry on

Hello..

I'm now writing from my school's desktop, haha..running from my unreliabale ACER zaman tok kadok because hubby brought his HP to work..I supposed to do some marking, but I chose to update my blog. (Betapa tak fokusnya cikgu ini..)

Hey, what made me here?I mean school??mm, to be honest it is just because I need some space to write, I mean to let my feeling off!!that's the truth. About marking, PEKA, Fail Kebersihan, question papers etc. I can simply bring it home and do it..BUT I'm still here in front of my pc just to share a story..a story about my spa..

I seldom write or tell about my spa because I dont really like people to know any problems occur in my business.And being a businesswoman (so called), I believe that I need to be strong to face any obstacles and unexpected problems that sometimes really ruin my mood n energy!!Exhausting!!

What happened today? I went to spa and do some clerical thingy, (biase la ntah ape2 je la yg I akan buat kan)..and when I was about to leave my spa, I saw Akma (my staff) watery eyes..I stood in front of her and asked why..she refused to talk, n I knew she tried to hold her tears..Well, I let her cry for few seconds before asking her again..waited patiently n she finally told me abot her worries..(which actually is something that I'm worrying about too!!)She's worrying about the fact that we havent got any new beautician to replace those who had left us for studies n etc (I do not want to elaborate)..It's ok readers, I'll take care of it.This is not my very first time facing and handling those troubles..I called my mom 2 days before to tell her, "Mak, kita dah tak larat dah mak..dah jadi lali dah..mcm2 dah berlaku pun..", n my mom as always will text me later, "be tough, good girl"..Well, she still call me a girl (I love you Mak)..

My point is, Akma can cry and I can be her shoulder to cry on..she still have the tears to cry..n she still have me to listen..what about me??I takut nak fikir sebab kenapa I dah tak boleh nak nangis, sometimes I think I'm just too egoist to cry..or is it becaused I had lost my feelings??My neighbour had once said,"Jangan biarkan diri Seri jd sampai xde perasaan..hati kering jer."

Oh no..I was driving to school just now carrying all those emotional baggage (nie pun satu masalah gak, bawak kereta dgn minda ntah kat mana2)..Ye ke aku nie dah tak de perasaan??or I just have to be strong to face everything??I need a shoulder to cry on...

Ya Allah, begitu sarat mindaku, bantulah dan ringankanlah..

Bukan Kemahuan Fikiran

This is what I DONT LIKE!!!
My hubby went off to work,n me living all alone in the middle of nowhere..
So, I ended up searching songs from Youtube n listened to it. This week had somehow turned to be Fauziah Latif week..I listened to all the songs that I used to get hooked up to when I was a teenager. Zaman jiwang karat, zaman when u listen to songs that will make u feel motivated or delighted, (Ye ke??)hehe..n hanyut dibuai asmara juga..haha..

N this lyrics is relly meaningful to me (once, n maybe for now as well..)

Aku relakan kau pergi dari sisi hatiku
Begini lama setelah tiada jalan penyudah
Jiwa yang hampa kan bertanya apa masih
Percintaan bukanlah kemahuan fikiran
Di perasaan tersimpan segalanya rahsia
Dan tiada dapat kutahankan rindu itu
Di antara kita bicara berbeza
Siapa yang merasa dia melara
Tiada upaya menahan derita
Cinta yang hampa
Seraut wajahmu yang paling indah
Walau ia ________ di hati ini
Seterusnya hidup bersimpul di dalam diri ini
Terlepaslah diriku dari rindu yang sarat
Aku kini tenggelam dalam sendu berbisa selamanya

Wah, I boleh tulis lirik tu without listening to it??sangat hafal?sangat bermakna kah?

Aku bagaikan sebutir pasir, yang lemah lagi kerdil.

Last Day before school reopens

Salam

3rd Jan 2010:

3.30 pm:Met Maznita at Maybank Seksyen 9 Bdr Baru Bangi (our registered meeting point), then Maznita drove to Puchong to get her new baju kurung Pahang from Ita(our registered tailor)

4.30 pm: Had our last 'mengeteh' session before new schooling session at Nuin, Little Perak in Bangi..had our teh tarik Ipoh, Popia Taiping n Nasi lemak Ipoh, Maz however chose to have Nasi Ayam Pasir Salak

5.30 pm: Had my spa session...haha, a good starter!!Takut nanti dah skolah tak sempat nak g spa pun!!A relaxation n soothing session however turned out to be somewhat a painful n sickening treatment!!!argh!!I dun really like it..(baik aku gi spa aku jeh)

7.30 pm: Rushed to stationery shop to get some stationeries, ohooo...it was so full!!Tak sangka parents n students pun chose to do last minute shopping!!Arghhh, I tak suka sesak2..

Sampai rumah terfikir..if I chose to do things earlier,mesti la tak perlu terkocoh-kacah pun kan???hehe..me somehow same je ngan semua org, semua benda pun nak buat pada saat2 akhir!!Typical me!!

To all, happy new year!It's back to school time=)

Kasihnya Ibu Membawa Ke Syurga

Salam...

Entri ini tercetus setelah beberapa hari perasaan hiba ini bergalang di hati..
I went to my eldest bro house warming at Alam Budiman, Shah Alam 2..
Me, ready in my Indonesian tie n dye batik.

As far as I concerned the area is well known as Puncak Alam.I saw UiTM campus on the way to his house.That was my very first time heading to that area from Bangi on my own. My hubby was in Australia that day. I tried to get help from GPS, but as usual I did not know on how to use it, hehe...poor me(I'm blind with all those gadgets!!, my colleagues used to call me 'Buta IT' last time)But in time, I'l find my way to the IT world..otherwise I wont have this boring blog rite=p)

I finally arrived my bro's place when they already performed their Solat Maghrib and was reciting yasin..haha..at least, I managed to be there to mengAminkan doa.
my bro the happy host

I like the house design n my nephew's, Ahmad Dhiaul Haq new bed, n his collections of girly story books, haha..but it's not my point here.
my dad as alwez akan jd org dapur

I need to leave early since I'm driving alone. So after finishing my meal n had some talk with my family members,


I walked to my car. My mom yelled, "Nanti jgn lupa amik lauk"..oh my, my mom will always have food to give to all her children..Whenever we meet at any occasion, any place, any reason..Org dulu2 kata, bingkisan. So before I left, I took the well packed food..yeah, it's all in the same sized microwave oven safe containers(mak beli tau kat kedai cina tu),put in 2 layers plastic bag(supaya tak meleleh keluar kalau tumpah) n together with a basin(tak lah goyang2 dlm kereta ko nanti)..
See the way mom prepared it

I always had a thought in my mind, can I do the same to my children??Mak will always be EXTRA prepared everytime she travels to see her sons and daughters..ops, credit to Ayah sebab AYAH WILL BE THE ONE WHO COOKS!Tp ayah akan buat benda yg mak dah plan..well, they are GOOD TEAM!

When I arrived home, I quickly open the bingkisan (balik nanti panaskan ape yg patut, nanti kang basi)..n I sat down in tears..
clockwise:Rendang daging, bubur asyura, pulut kuning, n kari ayam

I was alone there, the food are for my husband..he likes pulut kuning so much, eversince we married, my mom n dad will prepare pulut kuning everytime we balik Kuala Selangor without fail..N if he couldt join any kenduri, gathering etc..there'll always be a ""bingkisan" for him

I just love the way my parents showed their love for their children..this is one example of 1001 ways they had shown..despite of any negative views some people would say to the way they raised us..To me, every parents will give their BEST to their children..n I believe my parents had and will always do the best for us, in their own way..The question is: Had I done enough for my parents n Can I do the same to my children later? Eventhough I do not have any kids for now, but I know somehow, somewhen I will...n I want to be as good as my parents!

Mak N ayah , U ARE SIMPLY THE BEST!!

SATU kasih yang abadi, tiada tandingi DIA yang satu
DUA sayang berpanjangan, membawa ke syurga kasihnya Ibu
TIGA lapar dan dahaga, rela berpayahan setianya Ayah

Respect

Salam

I know almost every soul in this world want to live rich, to splurge in a luxury lifestyle..most of us, wanna carry a designer handbags, to fit in designer shoes..or at least to have a lot of money to go for an oversea vacation, to build an enormous bungalow n to drive a convertible?Merc?BMW?Porshe?Audi?Jaguar?owh..which ever luxurious car!

Some of us are just so lucky were born fed with the gold spoon, many of us really work hard to turn their dreams into reality..most of us are the spectators to all the luxurious other people possesed..some of us are happy with whatever they have while some of us will never get enough!Some of us trying hard every single day to be at par with others..

As for me, whatever lifestyle a people choose to live is their own choice. n every soul deserve to be respected. I'm so pissed off with this conversation I heard few days back:

A : Hey, I'm somewhere near to your office!
B : So, wud u want me to join u?
A : Definitely, n dat's y I called
B : Mm, I'm afraid I cudnt make it..it's still working hours
A : Ha..tu la, dulu org suruh masuk **** tak nak, ada masa sendiri, x payah susah2 keje mcm korang nie..(saja tulih dlm bm, supaya lebih menyakitkan hati..)

Excuse me!!people got their own way to live their life!Some people are very happy n content with watever they have n never feel desperate to live better!!Some people are very happy with their small pay because they just enjoy doing things they love..And some people just work because they choose to, not because they have to..So, cud u please RESPECT what other people choose to do in their lives??!!Not everyone born to be a MLM person, n not every one can succeed in that line..Having ALL people doing MLM, than who left to become teachers??to TEACH YOUR OWN CHILDREN???Who would run the laundry n grocery shop??for you to send YOUR DIRTY CLOTHES just bcoz you DO NOT Have the time to take care of it when YOU CLAIMED You do have ALL TIME in this world becoz YOU RE YOUR OWN BOSS??N who wud fly the plane for you to go for your so called sponsored OVERSEA SEMINAR??Hey, who do yo think you are to determine other people's live???

I'm not so against MLM thingy,I HATE YOUR WAY OF THINKING!!

PLEASE LEARN TO RESPECT OTHER PEOPLE'S CHOICE!!

Standard Guru Malaysia

Salam

I'm now watching Hujah on tv9 and it somehow made me think..The topic is Standard Guru Malaysia..there were telling that there are 3 major components to meet up the standard..

Suka aku dengar panel nie bergaduh2 ngan asakan soalan si perantara yang memang suka provoke itu.Aku masih menanti standard kualiti yg sedang mereka bangunkan sebagai dokumen rujukan..tak sabar rasanya nak baca dan koreksi diri..

Cara setiap orang menilai berbeza dan keperluan pelajar juga berbeza2..berbicara soal guru menjadikan aku sgt bersemangat!!

Adakah kita menepati setiap piawaian yg kita sendiri gariskan utk diri kita?
Mari koreksi diri=)

Jiwa kacau

Pernahkah kau terfikir seketika berada di tempatku
Membayangkan pahit manis berlalu
Tak siapa yang tahu
Mungkin nanti kau jua merasakan
Berdepan dengan kata menyesakkan
Takkan tugumu kebal
Tiada pertimbangan

I'm not so sure that is the correct lyrics, but this is what I have now in my mind..I'm a bit distracted these few days, I got things bothering me..still I'm looking for the correct person to share..(I'm not going to share,I bet)

Keheningan malam membangunkan..kepayahan jiwa meluahkan..





Ya Allah, ku mohon kekuatan meneruskan, moga tiap malamku menjadi peneman terbaik, moga maghfirah dan mardhiyahMu menjadi penyuluh terbaik..ku mohon.

p/s: Lyrics from Biarlah Rahsia, Siti Nurhaliza